4 hours ago
Another Shot at Love w/ Tayshia Starr
ahhh i'm stoked right about now, but i'm really trying to limit my level of excitment for fear of having my hopes crushed by reality. so let me fill you in on all the craziness since i'm sure you are staring at your screen wondering what the heck i'm talking about, ahh yea right. LOL
so for the last couple months i've been dating, well kind of dating this guy. he is 23 and in the navy, not orginally from the emerald city but currently stationed here. i remember the first date we had i wasn't sold on him at all, not because he was white (because i love men of all races), but more so because our personalities were so different. we were sitting in the cafe and i remember him smiling the entire time, i felt like i was a bit to bubbly for him because he was very mellow but i later found out that it was just nerves. we sat in that cafe for 4 hours talking about everything, we wanted to check out a movie but there were none showing for another hour so we obliged...and planned something for the following weekend. our next date was more simple, we watched a movie, had dinner, and chilled at his place...i had a wonderful time and i kept thinking how silly i was to pass him up just because he was too quiet. after our second date we planned to hang out again the next week, but something got in the way and we ended up not seeing each other for 2 months. he contacted me last month wanting to get together again, so i agreed to the idea. and here we are a few weeks later planning our 3rd date. he called me last night and we talked for about 20 minutes, although it seemed longer because we covered so much ground. we planned to do something on sunday, being that its easter i'm not sure how that will go but we shall see.
i'm a bit skeptical only because i have been let down so much in the past and i'm not sure if this is any different. i get the sense that he is very honest and that he has my best interest at heart so i'm going to just go with the flow and see how things go.
now on a different front i find myself thinking about the underlying factors that may pose an issue, well at least in the beginning if we were to decided to become exclusive. one that of him being in the navy. i have so much respect for the military men and women, but i'm not sure if that lifestyle is for me. i mean i can see the pros and cons and i feel comfortable saying that i probably could make it work, but it eventually becomes a LDR (long distance relationship) and those are typically in most cases prone to failure. he has already told me that he is deploying sometime in the summer/fall and he will be back on the east coast...so that makes me weary because i don't know how i would handle that. *le sigh* my other issue (which isn't a problem on my end) is his race, i am black and he is white. even though we are in 2009 and we have a bi-racial man in the white house there is still this stigma of black women being sellouts because the date white men. i don't care about the stares and the whispers because i'm comfortable with myself and i will love who i'm with regardless of what they look like. i'm more concerned about my family and his family and how that would work out...maybe i'm thinking a little too far ahead. :) but nonetheless, those are the only two issues that i see when it comes to him...i like him, he is a super great guy and he makes me laugh.
well i had no intention in this being an entire novel but hey..its early and my brain is warming up.
i will keep you updated on my date. wish me luck and send good prayers up to the big man for me. :)