insomnia.

insomnia - yes i am a sufferer.

i have always been the type of person who thrived after the sun had set. but i always had my limit and i never let myself get out of control. since the beginning of this year, well february to be exact i have been having trouble sleeping. i think it has a lot to do with my change in jobs and schools.

it sucks because my entire schedule is so backwards now. i'm up all night and sleep until at least 1pm every day. i feel like such a bum sometimes. i can't imagine how difficult it's going to be to handle this once i get a job. i know its going to be horrible. tossing and turning all night and being too tired to work the next day. i'm super worried. i missed the same interview 3 times in a row because i either woke up late or i was too tired to make it. so i know working is going to be hard.

my insomnia has become so chronic that now i don't even sleep while it's dark outside. i don't lay down until its completly daylight which nowadays is around 5:30am. crazy i know, right?!?

last night was ok, but that was only because i was drunk off my ass from a night of partying. i got home around 2am and had a little emotional break down. and i thnk i fell asleep around 3:30am. but i ended up waking kind of early. i was awakend around 9:30am and i tossed and turned trying to go back to sleep but i couldn't, so i ended up just getting out of bed and starting my day. it sucked because i wasn't ready at all.

i know that i should probaly take some sleeping pills, but i don't like taking medicine. so i think i'm going to try to regulate my sleep on my own. its an uphill battle, but i'm confident i will win!